In the course of this Self-obervation and self-reflection essay, I inten to illostaigh what I have learn about myself and what area I belive still need to understand. Psychotherapist Carl Rogers believe ‘ Congruence between feeling and action can never be total…choosing to be real with others is the single most important decision a person can make’. ( ) Agreeable with Rogers, nonetheless I know believe that the single most important decision a person can make is to be honest with oneself. Understanding their own feeling and being able to accept who they are, before being able to be ‘real’ with others. Since being aware of how self-observation and reflection are the most important tool for a counsellor or therapist. I decided to analyses my behaviour and the reason for my approach to my encounters, while self-searching I had a conversation with my mother about step dad.
At first, I could not bear to hear his name, as the conversation continues I grow more impatient and found myself feeling extremely annoy and unbearable thought about him. Nonetheless, I wanted to understand and emphasis with her, the more pretend to be interested the more I grow hostile. I though about my feelings and note how I felt, I realizes that the really hate I felt towards my step dad while growing up, was in fact for my mother, I despised the fact that she had put his needs and desire first, and has always pretend she was ok. Look back on this, I think it was much easier and acceptable for me to hate him rather than my mother. I always rebel in my relationships and often project my view on other who seems weak and control by their male partner, before I could never understand why these women seems are incapable of standing their ground.
After reflecting on my feels towards my step dad, I realized that I hated my mother for the way she allowed him to control her and I never really hated him. As a result I grow more over powering in my relationship and snapped at any sign of control or dictation. I get anxious and defensive when talking or trying to help these sorts of problems, I became the person I despised so much! More on more, I understand as a therapist one is required to understand the important their self, before offering help to other. Just by know my fears and understanding my feeling I am more comfortable to deal with them.
Processing a therapeutic and oneself is such a difficult achievement, trying to accomplish The overall aim of counselling is to provide an opportunity for the client to work towards living in a way he or she experiences as more satisfying and resourceful.
The objectives of a counselling relationship will vary according to the client’s needs. Counselling may be concerned with:
* developmental issues
* addressing and resolving specific problems
* making decisions
* coping with crisis
* developing personal insight and knowledge
* working through feelings of inner conflict
* or improving relationships with others.
The role of the counsellor is to facilitate the client’s work in ways which respect the client’s values, personal resources and capacity for choice within his or her cultural context.
British Association for Counselling
Code of ethics and practice for counsellors 2000, para 3.1 development of the capacities for self-‐reflection in order to increase self-‐ awareness, enhance personal skills in helping relationships and to support planning