The process-essay written by Diane Cole “Don’t just stand there” (Cole 346-350) describes examples of how someone when faced with an offensive comment may speak to the person who said the offensive remark(s). Overall this essay is very well written and the various examples of ways in which someone facing the difficult task of speaking to another person who has offended them by saying a racist or sexist remark, even in jest are clear and prescriptive (Cole 347-349). The structure of the essay however is not as clear as it could be particularly with the absence of a final summary. The inclusion of a summary would have been helpful in this essay as a number of specific scenarios were discussed throughout the essay and the reader can easily be confused as to which processes are recommended for what scenarios.
One particularly well-written passage in the Cole essay was “Think of yourself as an educator” (Jones qtd in Cole 348). This passage clearly forms a picture in the reader’s mind of the process the author is suggesting. This passage is one of the shortest and most simple within the essay and as such its clarity resonates the message it is designed to give to the reader. The ability to write an effective process – essay is a valuable tool to anyone who wishes to impart knowledge n a practical manner. The remainder of this paper will be addressing a process – essay designed to educate and motivate the reader on how to develop a genuine interest in any new person they may meet.
The skill of being able to generate a genuine interest in someone you have just met is a skill I believe everyone should know. It is particularly useful in a work situation, for example in the sales field but also in a work situation where either you are a new employee or you are welcoming a new co-worker. All to easily a stranger is dismissed as being difficult to relate to however the use of the skill I termed “dig deeper” makes developing a true interest in anyone possible. An example of this is skill is when a new co-worker arrives in the office and at first glance he appears to be very different to you. By asking three questions to this newly introduced person that ask for increasingly more in depth answers about a subject that is important to them a genuine connection is possible in a very short period of time.
By asking truly thoughtful questions about some one’s favorite leisure activity will show genuine interest from you and inevitably uncovers points of true curiosity from you and this is a wonderful foundation for a new work relationship and friendship. An effective and timely exercise, the “dig deeper” process allows sales people to bond with their prospects in a genuine way; a fake connection will lose the sale!
Following a three step process will inevitably lead to at least one point of interest. First step is to ask what that person’s favorite leisure activity is. Once he or she has told you then ask another question that makes your new co-worker have to think a little more deeply about that favorite leisure activity. The third step is to ask another question that relates directly to the second question and requires a more in depth answer.
In summary everyone’s favorite topic of conversation is themselves and particularly the pastime they most desire to spend their leisure time pursuing. By asking three questions that lead from each other in an increasingly in depth manner both parties to the conversation will find it extremely difficult not to find points of common interest. By establishing common points of interest a genuine connection can be made and this is a skill that is critical for success in all areas of life that deals with people.
Cole, D. (2001). “Don’t just stand there.” in The Prentice Hall Reader, 7th edition. Miller, G.(Ed) Prentice Hall, New York.